Sometimes when I look at the state of the world, I feel like Cindy Loo Hoo on Christmas Eve, standing in awe as the Grinch steals Christmas away. Most of the time I see things in the simplest bubble gum rainbow sort of view, that everyday has the potential for great things. That you can find pleasure and beauty in little moments. And then when something happens that causes me to question that, I feel as though my world is completely shaken. I have trouble separating isolated events from the bigger picture, and take those little moments to mean that everything must be completely horrible if something like THAT can happen.
Everything is not this way, of course. They’re just life tests — moments that question how badly you want your dream, and what you’re willing to give up to chase after it. I had one of these tests yesterday, as some important people in my life questioned whether a decision I was about to make was the right choice, convinced that it was going to sabotage my music career. So I had to stop and think. To realize that they were right. And to give up that less important desire for the greater cause of my music. My music is like my child. This ever-growing and precious spirit of mine that is so dear to my heart. I have to be careful to protect it all the time, to make sure that I am doing all the right things to ensure it’s success. And that’s a tough job sometimes because it really does involve giving up a lot, to work my ass off to support myself and it, and to not let other people’s naysaying get in the way of my confidence in pursuing it.
Here’s to everyone that is pursuing a dream of their own. I hope you are not letting anything get in the way of what you want to do more than anything else in this world. I hope you are able to find people and money and resources behind what you believe in, in the same way that I have been so lucky to do. I thank the stars every night for giving me such a beautiful life. It’s a hard path that makes me break down and cry sometimes, but the rest of the time I would have it no other way. Thank you, world.
Cheers.
